Notorious for his flame-grilled temper and unorthodox methods, Sgt. Randy Steakowitz of the Special Grilling Unit often finds himself embroiled in controversy. The well-seasoned sergeant's interrogations usually employ his patented “good sandwich/bad sandwich” technique, squeezing confessions from the most determined of criminals. Under Sgt. Steakowitz, the meat scales of justice have never been the same.
On the mean streets of San Burgerdino, you're either fast, or you're fast food. Not a problem for undercover cops Ken Charsky and Manuel “Manny” Hoof. Whether they're breaking up burger rings or foiling beef extortion plots, their 1969 Cowvette is Grade A greased lightning.
Expensive cars and gorgeous heifers are just some of the benefits of working for eccentric millionaire Chuck Porterhouse III. Sporting shades and a stockpile of floral shirts, studly private investigator Ross Angus leads a life of seemingly endless car chases and hoof-fights. Anything to keep the island of Mooui safe for chicken lovers.
As members of the California Hamburger Patrol, Officer Frank “Munch” Muncherello and his straitlaced partner, Jon Beefcaker, are all too familiar with the recent rash of burger smuggling that has plagued the highways of southern California. Patrolling the beat in aviator shades and rump-hugging pants, Munch and Jon have busted everyone from common jerky-heads to international beef lords.
Don't be fooled by his slovenly appearance and slow-witted ramblings. Lt. Cowlumbo leaves no bun unturned, solving the most gristly cases before the ketchup even dries. Beef eaters, beware! Cowlumbo will be all over you like a bad horsefly.
Forget trial by jury. This saucy heifer serves up justice faster than a drive-thru. With the help of her bailiff, “Bull,” Judge Phyllis has presided over hundreds of cases ranging from voluntary cowslaughter to illegal bun laundering. She's even butted heads with notorious crime boss Timmy “The Spatula” Zambrano.
The Lone Star State has been home to some legendary characters, but none more so than Hoofer, Texas Wrangler. With a black belt in moo-jitsu, Hoofer greets criminals with a swift round-roast kick to the face. But beneath his leathery hide he has a heart of gold, reaching out with open hooves and encouraging misguided children to stay away from beef.
In the high-steaks game of international beef trafficking, all roads lead through Baloney Beach. But thanks to mulleted mooers Ronny Brisquet and Rafael de Vaca, those days are coming to an end. Wearing an array of pastels and polyester, these undercover cows will do anything to bust crime chef Fatty Empanada.
If you're packing heat–the heat that makes burgers–you'd better hope these hot-tempered heifers don't find you. With their alluring beauty, special agents Bearnaise, Hollandaise and Mayonnaise may look like angels, but they hurt like a Charlie horse. There's no tougher meat on the Special Chicken Task Force.
In the often messy field of lunch scene investigation, it takes a special breed to crack the case. Led by Gus McGristle, chief beef examiner and an expert in greasy fingerprint identification, the BSI team reconstructs elaborate lunch scenes using fork trajectories, ketchup splatter patterns and the latest in sesame seed analysis.
Working for a top-secret foundation called the Feedlot, Agent MooGyver has an uncanny ability to escape even the greasiest situations. Whether he's fashioning a zip-line from a piece of baling wire or disarming a barbecue grill with a paper clip, the resourceful MooGyver has guided countless villains toward the ways of chicken-eating.